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White Chicks – Review

30 April 2005 No Comment

Two FBI agents Marcus (Marlon Wayans) and Kevin Copeland (Shawn Wayans) screw up a drug bust and are on thin ice with their boss. In order to get into his good graces they volunteer to escort two annoying heiresses Brittany and Tiffany Wilson to the Hamptons in order to use them as bait to catch a serial kidnapper. They unfortunately screw that up as well and then have to use disguises to look like the sisters in order to crack the case.

I had a feeling this movie was going to suck so I kept score of how many times I laughed, cringed, wanted to kill myself and how many times I wanted to kill the people who made this movie. Here goes the tally on average:

Laughs: 49, so that is a laugh about every two minutes.

Cringes: 33, every three minutes my skin crawled.

Suicide: 5, I wanted to open my wrists every twenty minutes.

Murder: 2, every fifty-five minutes I wanted to kill the creators.

Statistically speaking this movie not a train wreck but it isn’t pretty to look at either. Would I go watch this willingly? No! Why did I watch it? The movie I was supposed to watch wasn’t playing and I didn’t get the e-mail to say it was cancelled so I was blindsided into watching WHITE CHICKS.

I will never get those 109 minutes of my life back and I warn anyone who wants to spend money on this drivel, don’t! By Heroin or better get some Crack and find a bunch of Neo-Nazi’s and tell them you’re Jewish. The combined effect of Heroin/Crack and boots in your head should cause less brain damage than WHITE CHICKS.

That said; it does have its moments but not enough for me to spend money on it.

CAST: Shawn Wayans, Marlon Wayans and James King
DIRECTOR: Keenan Ivory Wayans
RUNNING TIME: 109 minutes
GENRE: Comedy
RELEASE DATE: 10 December 2004
RATING: 4/10

“It Sucks But Does Have It’s Moments”

Buy it now

Review by Punjabi_Goth for Africasgateway.com

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