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Other => Humour / Jokes => Topic started by: DaT NiGGa P-DuB on May 10, 2010, 04:52:09 PM

Title: English is not our first language
Post by: DaT NiGGa P-DuB on May 10, 2010, 04:52:09 PM
got this email today...im sure some of you have heard these quotes before...

 Steve lekolea is a legend...

English is not our first language we shouldn't be ashamed.

1) Bashin Mahlangu
Interviewer: Bashin how do you feel about scoring such a beautiful goal?       
Mahlangu: I feel immediately!!!

2) The Late Lesley Manyathela.
This was an interview to get to know more about the player after an extended period of rich form:
Interviewer: So Lesley tell us about your family
Manyathela: I have one KIDS. I also have two brothers: There is one in front of me and one behind me.

3)   Bhele Nomvete:
This interview took place after a game that took place on Bhele's birthday.       
Interviewer: Firstly, Bhele we would just like to wish you a happy birthday.
Nomvete: Thank you, thank you, same to you

4) Steve Lekeolea
(a whole book can be written using amusing quotes from this player alone)
Interviewer: Steve you seem to have hit such a rich vein of form you also seem a lot fitter. What is your secret?
Lekoelea: In the morning I get up and I run away. This one is taking the cup

5) Steve Lekeolea       
Interviewer: Steve you have just played an amazing game to help Pirates win, where to from here.
Lekoelea: I am going home.

6) Jabu Pule
Interviewer: Jabu, who do you think will host the 2010 soccer bid?
Jabu: Marks Maponyane

7) Peter Ndlovu
Interviewer: Peter those were three beautiful babies you put away behind the net. How do you feel?
Peter: Aah I am so ashamed, I just don't like it when these woman tell the whole world.
 
8) Mandoza....
Interviewer: Mandoza we have just received news that brenda fa**ie has pa**ed away. how do you feel about such saddening news?
Mandoza: eish, my sister this is like a dream come true..   
Title: Re: English is not our first language
Post by: Last of the old AG Hittaz on May 11, 2010, 07:14:56 AM

8) Mandoza....
Interviewer: Mandoza we have just received news that brenda fa**ie has pa**ed away. how do you feel about such saddening news?
Mandoza: eish, my sister this is like a dream come true..

lmao  ;D
Title: Re: English is not our first language
Post by: briCK on May 11, 2010, 09:28:31 AM
I was going to start a thread along these lines...but not exactly, a couple weeks ago.our own resident English Proffesor RiGgz was castigating me about the improper usage of esikaJoji and being the dick I am I shot him down with typical black answer..."its not my language why should I give a shit about using it properly?"

A couple of weeks later I was involved in an incident that made me re-evaluate that statement, being the dick I am I did not / nor see the need to say...you know what "William RiGgz, you might have had a point" maybe we should work on our English?

IS IT GOOD ENUFF TO BRUSH STUPID SHIT OFF WITH "I AM NOT ENGLISH" like blaming white people for anything I won't stop...but I mean mano a mano, niegro to niegro, Monkey to Monkey...can we REALLY allow black "proffesionals" or people in the public eye get away with calling shes hes and visa versa?


IT IS BASIC COMMUNICATION...not English..basic comms..

Title: Re: English is not our first language
Post by: Papa ThReAdS on May 11, 2010, 09:54:52 AM
I was going to start a thread along these lines...but not exactly, a couple weeks ago.our own resident English Proffesor RiGgz was castigating me about the improper usage of esikaJoji and being the dick I am I shot him down with typical black answer..."its not my language why should I give a shit about using it properly?"

A couple of weeks later I was involved in an incident that made me re-evaluate that statement, being the dick I am I did not / nor see the need to say...you know what "William RiGgz, you might have had a point" maybe we should work on our English?

IS IT GOOD ENUFF TO BRUSH STUPID SHIT OFF WITH "I AM NOT ENGLISH" like blaming white people for anything I won't stop...but I mean mano a mano, niegro to niegro, Monkey to Monkey...can we REALLY allow black "proffesionals" or people in the public eye get away with calling shes hes and visa versa?


IT IS BASIC COMMUNICATION...not English..basic comms..



Realtalk!

Title: Re: English is not our first language
Post by: A pimp named Sarkozy on May 11, 2010, 10:10:50 AM
Interviewer:So whats your favourite Dish?
Bennet lushozi:Tupperware, mfethu

Anyway ive broken the english words in my time!! after i said in a job interview back in 2002.

What are your strengths?

Me: Im an Alcohol they were like ok carry on1!! after few sentences i was like   no no no that came out wrong!!! im a workaholic  :o :o :o
Embara**ing moment
Title: Re: English is not our first language
Post by: RearrangedReality on May 11, 2010, 10:21:11 AM
What are your strengths?

Me: Im an Alcohol they were like ok carry on1!! after few sentences i was like   no no no that came out wrong!!! im a workaholic  :o :o :o
Embara**ing moment

you don't need more people, you're New Jack after all.
Title: Re: English is not our first language
Post by: Touareg on May 11, 2010, 10:26:46 AM
What are your strengths?

Me: Im an Alcohol they were like ok carry on1!! after few sentences i was like   no no no that came out wrong!!! im a workaholic  :o :o :o
Embara**ing moment

you don't need more people, you're New Jack after all.
lol!
Title: Re: English is not our first language
Post by: briCK on May 11, 2010, 11:39:57 AM
The Incedent at hand is this....

I am sitting looking the other way....First I got not problems with how you speak, but please get your point across...


anyway..I could have sworn it was two white people talking to each other, we all know black people

there are those who are fluent(Gamatically) and those who speak white (Accent and ALLES)


there is a conversation going on behind and I a**umed it was white people talking....content always gives shit away..there is no way in hell white people could be talking the monkey (Content) these people were talking

I turn around and I see two black speak like white people...I was flabbegusted..its one thing when heads speak to each other in coz most of it is slang and broken English..

but these two were eloquent and proper and using English proper...

its like watching two cats barking its was scary...

...I digress.

I belive as a wroking proffesional you don't have to pronounce ....Country as c***ree...as opposed to count tree for example...but you can be telling youboss that Mandla she is off sick today...that grammer, thats what Communication Skills is about..its not about speaking english white its just constructing your sentances in such a way that the message your are tryna coney gets across...I bet people who say mandl she...write or type grammatically correct english...so why is it hard to work on your vocal grammer...i am not talking bout

Grasping the Queens English to the level a f***er like had to....but dude...