so tha afronaut does his weekly check up on his groupies that hang around the monte casino in an effort to sell sum beer. The reason he was sellin beer is coz he knew -aint no way in hell he gon have a ticket to the dj vadim show on sat unless sum heavy hustlin occurs.
I stepped first to sum 15 year old blonds that i percieved to be the mizchivous, horny drunk type. IM like
"he ladies, howza bout sum pure inebreation for the liver yea?"
they on sum
"nigga please, we dont drink beer"
so im on sum
"bitch, ull give me a** for sorbet but u wont gimme 60 bux for beer, voetsek!!!"
this world is backwadz!!!!and so im huffin, astonished by the rude behaviour of these naive a** barbie doll skeezers.
and i think to myself
"yeeeeeeeeeah, skaters are often drunks n stoners so they wont have no prob buyin my beer"
So i step to a crew thats often around the boogaloos skate park n commence my bizness
"gents, got some beer yea, six tiger no more no less."
f***ing bastards look @ the naut n start scheming on my stash like
"we must steal his beer, then f*** him up for a**uming we ever have cash for anything"
f*** that, a true backpacker will be armed to the halitosis outlet, he will not allow sum punk a** skaters take his beer so i stare @ em dead in the eye n say
"you cheap a** punks, f*** you all. eat a collective dick and die from an overload of estrogen in ur systems, then ill visit each of your grave sites, dig u up n dump in ur face before i gooi u back in ur ole shitheads"
before i was even about to get to the nice gorey parts i realised these cats were like twelve too(the on kid started crying and dashed off to call his momma)
So I realised how stupid i myself iz n decided f*** that, ill go rob the tip cup in cobblestone pub toilet for cash then and headed to time out.
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now this was a nite to remember!!!!!!
I got there with my bag full of warm castle lights and a pocket full of cents, pissed off coz the dude in the toilet caught me while i was goin for the 5 rand coin and figgad f*** this place. imma kill my beer then go home.
to my surprise louis was killin the floor with cla**ic set containing of jedi mind tricks, redman, company flow, reflection eternal, non phixion n all dat shit. So i forgot about the whole argument with the bathroom man and the little scuffle i had with the montecasino bouncers (u cant see me, idiotz!!!!) and began my mosh phase.
It was cool cos i wasnt the only black in the house @ the time, ran into dethkowd n 3wr repping for demoltion crew on the nite so there was alot of familiar faces. reminiscent of the nites we used to kill @ insanity wen cats wud battle for respect and groupies.
i decided to find a place to lay my bag full of fermented herbal teas and bond with some hunneys i kno for a while. they were cool, the kept giving me ciggarettes and suggesting golden showers in the bathrooms.I remember thinking to myself
"haaaaaaaaaa, pure caucasian cartoonery" :-]
thats wen my boy rattex showed up. Now gundwana is by far the craziest cat I know. Looking back @ his metamorphosis from high school to outta school, he has changed into a wierd being.
He is a revolutionary with deeply rooted anger at the struggle that occured in the apartheid era but most of his friends are rugby jocks and barbie girls(isnt it ironic).
5 months ago his favorite artists were vanessa carlton and linkin park and he prefered it if people referred to him as --------- dicaprio.Now he is a poetic brother with revolutionary dreams and ambitions(one being i produce a whole album for him, hahahahahahahaaaa)
Nobody kills me more than the ratmiester.
Well, on my way to his car I see this huge brada rocking a bald head and a drunken expression. I step to him on sum
"Tate!"
He on sum
"yeeeeeeah?
" :-(
notice the scary face, n im on sum
"relax urself mang, i aint gonna rob u. I recodnised the hipocalypse t-shirt, the name is Ootz."
so we kick it off and I force him to listen to my breaks while i sip on Castle light "on the rocks". He looked real bored so he excused himself and went right into the bar n chilled wit his people.
Thats how I know my shit is wack Nyambz!!!!!!!!!After a couple of beers, it was time for me to mosh properly plus redwood was on the deck now. (that dude is psycho on the decks, and his beatbox is pure concentrated aids) I decided to have those free shots I recieved from the door when I payed to get in and hustle more from my b-boy buddies so i can get sloshed real good and go home without any worry of freezing through the cold jozi nites.
l8r in the nite
so im killing more ciggarettes n here comes tate, hes mumbling sumthin n im not really intrested so i forced sum ada jewish hunneys(neva seen em in my life, have no idea wat they look like anymore i jus remember the short one had orange hair and a wide mouth, im sure i cud fit my fist in her mouth, thats wat made me get off) to keep him company n tell him how great i am but they ended up talking about the
Hipocalyse Shirt and here I am thinking to myself
"bitch, u are in the presence of greatness n all u can talk about is a blooooooody shirt. VOETSEK SKEEZA"
But tate was loving that shit, he smooth talked n charmed them hunneys til the point they were willing to swop shirts with tate so i decided i must cock block
(DONT SHINE ON MY SHINE NIGGER!!!!!!!)and made sure that they settle with getting me drinks but tate once again took over n killed my flow. Eventually i was sober n tate was giving free shots to everybody in the bar while doin sum topless dancing on the tables(i told u not to trust em jewish women dawg, u didnt listen - eye drops). KAKAKAKAKAkAkAKAAAAAAAAAAAAA
then beez hit the decks, didnt like his set. wasnt any real turntablism jus normal djayin. So i start complainin n sum kat tells me this cat is actually from s.a. n hee been in the uk for a year. so im totally stumped n i step outside seeking clarity.
Louis hit the decks an hour l8r n coninued to dish out some heavy shit, so i had no probs wit being sober there. it was a phat nite.
6 backpacks outta 10
not the greatest nite for me but, still had fun 8-)
