46
Show Posts
This section allows you to view all posts made by this member. Note that you can only see posts made in areas you currently have access to.
47
Humour / Jokes / Lost his balls
« on: April 26, 2010, 05:54:28 PM »
This is the funniest shit I have seen in ages.
48
Geek Section / HOng Kong FTW
« on: April 20, 2010, 10:17:04 AM »
I am seriously considering the move now. I've been checking out teaching positions in Korea and Hong Kong for the last few days.
Check this shit out:
Check this shit out:
Quote
Hong Kong’s City Telecom slashes prices on its 1 Gbps fiber-to-the-home service; lifts the bar for broadband worldwide
Telkom is getting set to launch 10 Mbps ADSL services, bringing South Africa closer to international standards in terms of fixed line broadband speeds. These higher speeds are however a long way off what broadband subscribers in Hong Kong are accustomed to.
Broadband users in Hong Kong have long enjoyed speeds of 100 Mbps and even 1 Gbps, but a recent development means that high end broadband offerings have become far more affordable.
Hong Kong Broadband Network Limited (HKBN) announced last week that its subscribers can now enjoy a symmetric 1 Gbps broadband service at HK$199 (R190) per month. This service compliments its company’s symmetric 100 Mbps service for HK$99 (R94) per month.
"Symmetric 1 Gbps broadband at US$26/month (HK$199) is a global breakthrough service, and is by far the best value in terms of cost per Mbps in Hong Kong. We are pleased to contribute towards making Hong Kong a global Fibre Oasis," said Ms. June Lam, a**ociate Director, Marketing, HKBN.
49
General Discussion / Holy shit!
« on: April 03, 2010, 10:46:53 PM »
Eugene Terblanche was just murdered on his farm by one of his workers.
I see a big political shitstorm coming because of this. Especially after all the controversy over Malema and his singing career last week.
I see a big political shitstorm coming because of this. Especially after all the controversy over Malema and his singing career last week.
50
General Discussion / Jigga fans
« on: March 29, 2010, 10:06:25 AM »
YOu can now cop one of these and pretend that you're Joe Camel every night.
http://mto.mediatakeout.com/39782/company_creates_a_realistic_beyonce_love_doll_pics.html?image=41761
http://mto.mediatakeout.com/39782/company_creates_a_realistic_beyonce_love_doll_pics.html?image=41761
52
General Discussion / Goodnight sweet prince
« on: March 22, 2010, 07:56:40 PM »
Seems he couldn;t handle all the shit that came with killing four people, so he killed another one.
Apparently he had been disturbed, but not getting counsellig after the accident.
Now he is gone.
53
Media / What was Zuma saying?
« on: March 03, 2010, 04:47:50 PM »
When I saw the look on her face, this is the first thing that popped into my head.
54
General Discussion / What do I do?
« on: March 03, 2010, 09:42:10 AM »
So, what do I do?
There is this lady I work with. She is pretty, fun, and I spent the night with her.
Problem is, she is the complete antithesis of what I usually look for in a woman. She hangs with the pretty people, is dumb, ignorant of what is happening in the world and generally not too bright.
She is sexy as f*** though and unlike with other sexy but dumb chicks, I find myself inexplicably drawn to her. Kinda like a moth, to a pretty, but mindless flame.
Basically, she is a cheerleader who hangs with the jocks and popular crowd and I get to pound.
Why am I doing this? How do I stop liking it?
Oh, and by the way, have you seen this?
http://i.americanapparel.net/storefront/UGCStyle/BestBottom2010/Browse.asp
There is this lady I work with. She is pretty, fun, and I spent the night with her.
Problem is, she is the complete antithesis of what I usually look for in a woman. She hangs with the pretty people, is dumb, ignorant of what is happening in the world and generally not too bright.
She is sexy as f*** though and unlike with other sexy but dumb chicks, I find myself inexplicably drawn to her. Kinda like a moth, to a pretty, but mindless flame.
Basically, she is a cheerleader who hangs with the jocks and popular crowd and I get to pound.
Why am I doing this? How do I stop liking it?
Oh, and by the way, have you seen this?
http://i.americanapparel.net/storefront/UGCStyle/BestBottom2010/Browse.asp
55
Humour / Jokes / If Tiger's apology was sincere
« on: February 28, 2010, 02:35:23 PM »
Funny shit I just found on Cracked:
Quote
Good afternoon, members of the Press, Friends, Family, President of the Nike Corporation, CEO of Buick, Mom and fans across the world. I come before you today to answer for my actions, and I plan on doing that. I want to first thank you all for coming and supporting me during this, for the sake of argument, “difficult” time. All of your letters of encouragement have been very comforting, I guess.
I know all the parts that we’re supposed to play. You’re all doing an excellent job of being absolutely mortified that I’m human, and I’m supposed to come out and talk about how confused and profoundly damaged I must be. But instead of all that, I’d like to, for once, talk about an adult situation like an adult to a bunch of other adults. Hopefully, by the end of my speech, you’ll understand why I did what I did, and we’ll all be able to move pa**ed this.
I’m Tiger Woods
Think about that. Really let it sink in. You know who I am even if you probably can’t name a single other golfer (athletes/actors-turned golfers and Greg Norman don’t count). I am Tiger Woods. It takes giant balls to say to your friends one day, “Hey, from now on my name is ‘Tiger’” and actually pull it off. And I did, because I have ‘em.
There are people out there, men, who say they would never do what I did. I appreciate your display of what you think is honor and integrity, but I’m going to be straight with you: You cannot make that claim until you’ve lived like Tiger Woods for a few months. And, brother, you have not. I am the only person on this planet who knows what it’s like to be Tiger Woods. It is a hard, lonely and, yes, a**-filled world. You might think you see temptation from coworkers, or friends or ex-girlfriends, and you may have resisted them all. But being Tiger Woods enters you into a brand new world of temptation, things you couldn’t even imagine. I’m the captain of the football team of the universe.
I can’t stress how easy these women make incognito f***ing. I’ll find them waiting in my hotel room, already in my bed and swearing they’ll never tell anyone about this and they’ll be gone in the morning. A naked chick, in my bed, saying, “No one will find out, I just want to have sex with you one time and then I’ll be on my way.” You can’t even imagine a scenario where that happens for you, and it happens to me multiple times a day. Women break into my limo while it’s moving and try to have sex with me. Have you ever tried to push a half-naked 19-year-old out of the sun roof of a moving limousine? Of course you haven’t. One time on the course I reached into the hole to retrieve my ball and there was a titty in there. I still don’t know how she got in there, she must’ve been waiting underground for days. I mean, how did she even breathe?
But I’m straying. My point is, I’m in a culture that screams my name and elevates me to God-like status because I’m dynamite at golfing, and I’m surrounded by gorgeous women who make it so easy to have sex with them I’d be stupid not to. It’s easy for you to turn down hypothetical sex with a cute woman you see on the subway who might be flirting with you. Sometimes I wake up and women are already f***ing me somehow. 10,000 miles from home, could you turn that down? You don’t know how to answer because it isn’t part of your reality.
Of course you wouldn’t have made the same moves I made: We’re playing two different games.
I’ve Earned This
For two reasons. To begin with, you made me this way, America. You wanted a superstar, somebody to put on a pedestal. You don’t even want a really good golfer, you want an inhumanly good golfer, the best in history. I wanted to make a living doing something I liked, but you wanted me to be the greatest. So fine, I’ll do that. I’ve broken every golf record, I’m athlete of the year, athlete of the decade, hell, I got a hole-in-one in real golf. This stuff is certainly difficult but I do it. And I put up with how badly society wants me to be the Golf God, but there’s got to be a give and take, right? You want a superhero, so I’ll be one, fine. Just so long as I can get some f***ing done on the side. I don’t think I’m being unreasonable. The media follows me every day to see what I’m doing. People come up to me on the street and tell me I’m the greatest. If I’m so great, shouldn’t I be f***ing something? I think you see my point.
Additionally, you may not know this, but my real name is Eldrick Tont Woods. Say it out loud. Look in the mirror and introduce yourself as Eldrick Tont, and see if you don’t want to beat you up. Do you think I scored a lot of a** in high school being a golf-loving, black/Asian/Indian kid named Eldrick? That’s not a boy’s name, I sound like some kind of goddamned forest mage.
Do you know how many sorority sisters were chasing after dudes who read Golf Digest and idolized Jack Nicklaus? f***ing zero. “Oooh, Eldrick, your putting makes me so hot. Can you show me your Junior World Golf Championship medals again?” Bullshit. A mixed race, giant-toothed kid in Orange County, the whitest place on the planet, who had weird hobbies? Don’t tell me I didn’t earn as much porking as I can get my hands on.
My Marriage
Look, I’ll be straight with you. My marriage is… fine, sure. I don’t want to talk a lot of shit on my marriage, but at the end of the day, she’s a Swedish model who married a professional athlete worth over a hundred million dollars. Terrific girl. Would we have met and married if I wasn’t Tiger Woods? Or if she wasn’t a Swedish model? I don’t know, but probably not. Do you know why she came to America? On the advice of another Swedish model who was married to a golfer. It’s just sort of how things go. And to begin with, when your marriage lives and dies in the media, the sanctity of that marriage is ultimately, at best, shaky. There will always be doubt on both sides, because the circumstances by which we came together are so suspect. “He only likes me because I’m a model,” “She only likes me because I’m Tiger Woods.”
And stop feeling sorry for her. She’s f***ing Tiger Woods in one of her many luxurious mansions. She’s doing fine. And, at any rate, what does it matter? As far as your golf-watching experience goes, what does it even matter? Did you watch me, buy my games and enjoy my commercials because I ruled a** at golf, or because you thought I was faithfully sticking it only to my wife?
Sex is Awesome and I’m Great At It
Look, we’re all adults here. This doesn’t need to turn into a farce. I know for a fact that if I claim this is a problem, and if I check into rehab for any period of time, every single person who is currently mad at me will forgive me unconditionally. Some of you will support me even harder, because our culture loves comeback stories. I know that all it takes is a few weeks in a resort-like rehab clinic. You don’t need a doctor to say I’m cured, you don’t need a report detailing my recovery, you don’t need to any kind of verifiable proof whatsoever that suggests I’ve changed in any way. You just need to physically see me walk in and out of a building that says “Rehab” on the side and that is literally all you’d need to forgive me.
As easy as that is, I’m not going to do it for two reasons. For one, it’s just a shallow, ridiculous play that I want no part of. It’s like a puppet show for adults. The reason puppet shows are entertaining when you’re a kid is because you can’t see the strings. Once you see the strings, the magic’s gone and you’re just watching a guy playing with dolls and going through the motions. How is that a rewarding experience?
And beyond that, I’m not a sex addict. I’m just not. It’s not a disease I suffer from, it’s not a problem, it’s never physically hurt in any way I didn’t want it to hurt. I just really, really like it.
And I’m really, really good at it. I don’t want to say I’m the best, just yet. A few people have been calling me “the Tiger Woods of f***ing,” and that might be a bit premature, but I don’t think it’s too far off, either. I certainly want to be the best, and I won’t rest until I am, but for now I’m just a guy who really likes putting my dick in things. Any guy in the audience pretending he isn’t the exact same way is a dirty, filthy liar.
And finally,
I am Tiger Woods
Seriously. Do you even get that? Tiger f***ing Woods.
56
Geek Section / Oh my God, Oh my God, Oh my God, Oh my God, Oh my God, Oh my God, Oh my God, Oh
« on: February 25, 2010, 02:25:30 PM »
http://www.screamer.co.za/adsl.php
I was about to go with Axxess, but this is it. I am calling them right now!
I was about to go with Axxess, but this is it. I am calling them right now!
57
Politics / Eskom increase
« on: February 24, 2010, 01:54:41 PM »
Suddenly I feel like stayin gin my parents' house till I die.
25% ? Seriously?
And then these motherf***ers claim they have the welfare of the poor at heart? Most of us already struggle to cope and we are middle cla**. How the f*** are the poor folk gonna survive?
This is disgusting, because if it weren't for the poor management of the rich fat cats that won't feel the increase at all due to their ma**ive salaries and graft, we wouldn't need this shit.
25% ? Seriously?
And then these motherf***ers claim they have the welfare of the poor at heart? Most of us already struggle to cope and we are middle cla**. How the f*** are the poor folk gonna survive?
This is disgusting, because if it weren't for the poor management of the rich fat cats that won't feel the increase at all due to their ma**ive salaries and graft, we wouldn't need this shit.
58
General Discussion / Oh Shit!
« on: February 23, 2010, 05:20:27 PM »
So, we're just shitting ourselves on national TV now?
Seriously?
http://community.livejournal.com/ohnotheydidnt/44322420.html
Seriously?
http://community.livejournal.com/ohnotheydidnt/44322420.html
59
General Discussion / we are the world
« on: February 17, 2010, 07:40:36 PM »
What do you guys think?
I think Wyclef ruins it, and I have a real problem with the fact that they had all the autotune idiots on there.
Besides that, it is a good remake and I appreciate the fact that they left Mike in, instead of trying to replace him, although Janet sang some of his parts.
I also like the way they included the rappers.
Not a bad effort though, despite the parts I just mentioned.
I think Wyclef ruins it, and I have a real problem with the fact that they had all the autotune idiots on there.
Besides that, it is a good remake and I appreciate the fact that they left Mike in, instead of trying to replace him, although Janet sang some of his parts.
I also like the way they included the rappers.
Not a bad effort though, despite the parts I just mentioned.
60
General Discussion / Wannabe thug gets a**whipped by Hulk Hogan's granddad
« on: February 17, 2010, 12:24:56 PM »